Organising a Funeral

You can choose whatever Celebrant you would like.

If you do not know of a Celebrant, check out the UK Society of Celebrants listings.

Your Funeral Director will also know of local Celebrants if you are unsure. They can guide you, and the final choice is yours to make.

I contact families as soon as possible to arrange a face-to-face meeting, normally in your home so you feel as comfortable as possible. If for any reason this does not work for you, I can also work over the phone or via video calls.  Please be prepared for me to ask if you can send me some photos of your loved one before our meeting.

Then, I will gently guide you through a conversation where I can identify what the deceased and the family’s wishes are, and glean a great understanding of the person who you are saying goodbye to was.

I do have to ask quite a few questions but there is plenty of time, and no rush.  If things are difficult, I change the topic until we can come back to it. 

These questions includes ones about the life of your loved one, what made them laugh, their key character traits, their morals and values, and what made  them tick.

Funerals are normally arranged by the nearest relatives and / or friends. Your loved one may have left instructions about the type of funeral they wanted which can be helpful. 

Most funerals are arranged through a funeral director (though you can arrange them yourself). I can recommend Forget me Not Funerals, and you can also search the National Association of Funeral Directors. 

Check the services available and price list and decide what you would like, asking for a written estimate. 

Funeral Directors will tend to offer:

  • a coffin

  • transport of the body of the person who has died to the funeral director’s premises

  • the care of the person who has died until the funeral. This will include washing and dressing the person who has died

  • providing a hearse to take the body to the nearest crematorium or burial ground

  • providing the pallbearers to carry the coffin

  • making all other necessary arrangements, for example, getting the required forms.

Other services funeral directors can offer may include:

  • flowers

  • a more expensive coffin and fittings

  • press notices

  • a medical certificate required for cremation, and any doctor’s fees for signing this

  • fees for religious services

  • a burial or crematorium fee. The burial fee will usually include the costs of preparing the grave

  • extra cars for the family and close friends

  • embalming

  • extra services by the funeral director, for example, use of the Chapel of Rest, transport from the mortuary, or special viewing arrangements

  • Order of Service

You may be asked to pay a deposit before making arrangements.  

You may be offered a discount to pay for the funeral before or straight after. 

The deceased may have made financial arrangements via insurance / estate funds.

Speak to your Funeral Director to see if you can pay in instalments, or after the legal estate process. 

When it comes to the ceremony on the day, a lot of people prefer upbeat ceremonies, a real Celebration of life, which can include elements of your choice:

  • Music
  • Readings
  • Poetry
  • Flower giving
  • Other elements such as tree planting (normally more suited to memorials)

I will discuss your choices and create an order to pass to your Funeral Director who normally produces the order of service for you.